The Gay Model

The Jerky Boys, album 1

Title: The Gay Model


Summary: The skit unfolds as Crystal receives a call from an enthusiastic but bizarre individual, Voice 1, inquiring about a modeling job. Crystal, seemingly oblivious to the oddity, engages in conversation, expressing excitement about the caller’s purported talents. However, things take a peculiar turn when Voice 1 describes unconventional acts, including self-immolation as a performance, beating animals on stage, and the ability to pull large furniture from his posterior.

Throughout the conversation, Crystal maintains a mix of confusion, amusement, and a strained attempt to steer the conversation towards a meeting. Voice 1 persists in describing increasingly absurd acts, expressing a desire to showcase these talents to someone named Ronaldo, despite Crystal’s insistence that it’s actually Elon they need to impress.

The exchange escalates comically as Voice 1’s eccentricities continue, culminating in arrangements being made to meet, leaving Crystal in a state of amused disbelief. The conversation ends with Voice 1 affirming the receipt of the address, leaving Crystal to contemplate the eccentric encounter.

The skit navigates the absurdity of the conversation, highlighting Crystal’s attempts to navigate the surreal and nonsensical dialogue with a mix of humor and confusion as she tries to arrange a meeting despite the caller’s bizarre claims.


0:00 Phone rings..

0:01 Crystal: “Hello.”

0:02 Voice 1: “Hello Crystal.”

0:03 Crystal: “Who’s this?”

0:04 Voice 1: “Uhh, this is a friend. Listen, I was told to call you…”

0:07 Crystal: “Okay.”

0:08 Voice 1: “…for a modeling job.”

0:09 Crystal: “Yes.”

0:10 Voice 1: “I wanna to show you my goods.”

0:12 Crystal: “You will need to…”

0:14 Voice 1: “Yes, I want to come in and just give it all. I want to show you what I’m  capable of.”

0:17 Crystal: “Oh, excellent! Really fantastic! Why don’t you just come in, okay? I’ll give you the address. Uh, how tall are you?”

0:25 Voice 1: “Pardon?”

0:26 Crystal: “How tall are you?

0:26 Voice 1: “Oh, I’m approximately 6 foot 1.”

0:29 Crystal: “Oh, wow! Excellent! Have you ever done runway?”

0:32 Voice 1: “Uh, runway is just old hat to me sweetheart.”

0:35 Crystal: “Laughter… ahh!”

0:37 Voice 1: “Let me… let me tell you what I really do. I soak myself in lamp oil and then I burn myself in front of the crowd.”

0:46: Crystal: “Oh.”

0:46 Voice 1: “It works.”

0:47 Crystal: “I…”

0:47 Voice 1: “Honey, listen. It works.”

0:49 Crystal: “Gonna be appropriate, I mean.”

0:50 Voice 1: “Oh, it’s appropriate.”

0:51 Crystal: “[Inaudible 00:51].”

0:52 Voice 1: “People love it. The people love it.”

0:55 Crystal: “Have you… how many times have you…?”

0:57 Voice 1: “Well, I’ve burned myself several times. I’m only scarred about the face and breast, chest, neck and head. It’s not too bad, but… umm, other than that, I look fine. A little makeup conceals everything.”

1:10 Crystal: “Well, uh.”

1:11 Voice 1: “Look, I have other acts too.”

1:12 Crystal: “Uh! Listen, why don’t I put you on hold for a second?”

1:15 Voice 1: “Hurry up.”

1:17 Laughter in the background.

1:21 Crystal: “Hello.”

1:22 Voice 1: “Yes. It’s…”

1:23 Crystal: “Burn man?”

1:23 Voice 1: “Crystal?”

1:24 Crystal: “Are you the burn man?”

1:25 Voice 1: “Yes.”

1:26 Crystal: “Oh, okay.”

1:27 Voice 1: “Listen to me.”

1:28 Crystal: “Yes.”

1:29 Voice 1: “I have other little… the… little tricks I do, trinkets and what not. I jump around with dogs on the stage. I bring a little chipmunk in and a little monkey and I beat him senseless in front of the crowd. They love that. I put a little ballerina skirt on the monkey and I beat him into oblivion. The crowd seems to love this.”

1:48 Crystal: “Oh!”

1:49 Voice 1: “Okay. Where can we go with this?”

1:51 Crystal: “Okay, does that have…”

1:52 Voice 1: “Show me.”

1:53 Crystal: “[Inaudible 01:53].”

1:53 Voice 1: “Talk to me you silly little freak.”

1:55 Crystal: “Why don’t you just come in to the [Inaudible 01:57] and maybe we can see it in person and we could discuss it.”

2:00 Voice 1: “Okay. Umm… also I’m …I’m known very, very well for pulling large pieces of furniture from my ass.”

2:08 Crystal: Laughs hysterically.

2:10 Crystal: “From your ass?”

2:11 Laughter in the background.

2:12 Voice 1: “Yes. I’ve been… I’ve been doing it for years. I’m the best. I… see, I could bring you…”

2:17 Crystal: “[Inaudible 02:17]…”

2:17 Voice 1: “I could…”

2:18 Crystal: “…large furniture out of his ass.”

2:21 Laughter

2:22 Voice 1: “Honey, would you just give me the chance?”

2:24 Crystal: “Okay, I’ll…”

2:25 Voice 1: “Let me come down there and go nuts. I will freak you out.”

2:28 Crystal: “Oh, I know you’ll freak me [Inaudible 02:30] and you’re freaking me over the phone. Just imagine in person!”

2:33 Voice 1: “Oh, ho! I’d do something when I see you honey that you wouldn’t believe.”

2:36 Crystal: Giggles.

2:37 Voice 1: “Is Ronaldo around?”

2:39 Crystal: “Who?”

2:39 Voice 1: “Ronaldo.”

2:40 Crystal: “Ronaldo?”

2:41 Voice 1: “I want to show him my toolbox.”

2:44 Crystal: “No. It’s Elon, Elon [Inaudible 02:46]. You have to show Elon, not Ronaldo.”

2:48 Voice 1: “Oh! Well, I’d show it…”

2:49 Crystal: “We don’t have a Ronaldo.”

2:49 Voice 1: “Let me tell you something. I’d show it to Elon in a big way honey.”

2:53 Crystal: “Or we have Brett Weir here, so…”

2:55 Voice 1: “Who… Brett Weir? What is that?”

2:57 Crystal: “[Inaudible 02:57]… maybe you can see him.”

2:59 Voice 1: “Ooh! I would love to see him silly.”

3:01 Crystal: “Okay.”

3:01 Voice 1: “Okay, listen. I’ll be down as soon as possible sweetie cakes.’

3:04 Crystal: “Okay, you have the address.”

3:06 Voice 1: “Okay.”

3:06 Crystal: “Okay.”

3:07 Voice 1: “See you later jellyfin.”

3:08 Crystal: “You have the address.”

3:09 Voice 1: “Okay. I have it. Thank you.”

3:11 Crystal: “Okay. Thank you.”

3:11 Voice 1: “Okay, bye-bye.”

“The Gay Model: Breaking Barriers and Celebrating Inclusivity in the Fashion Industry”

In recent years, the fashion industry has made significant strides towards inclusivity and diversity. A prime example of this positive change is the emergence of gay models who are proudly challenging stereotypes and breaking barriers. One notable figure in this movement is the Gay Model, a platform that celebrates the LGBTQ+ community’s presence in fashion. In this article, we will explore the significance of the Gay Model website and its role in promoting inclusivity, acceptance, and representation.

The Gay Model: Embracing Diversity:

The Gay Model website ( is an online platform that showcases the talents and stories of gay models from around the world. It serves as a powerful medium to amplify the voices of LGBTQ+ individuals who have long been underrepresented in the fashion industry. By providing a space for gay models to shine, the website helps challenge societal norms and celebrates the richness of diversity within the modeling world.

Breaking Stereotypes:

The Gay Model is not just a platform for showcasing stunning fashion photography; it also works to challenge stereotypes and misconceptions surrounding the LGBTQ+ community. Through interviews, articles, and personal stories, the website provides an insight into the unique experiences and perspectives of gay models. By sharing their stories, these models help dispel common misconceptions and showcase the immense talent and professionalism they bring to the fashion industry.

Promoting Inclusivity:

Inclusivity is at the heart of the Gay Model’s mission. By featuring a wide range of gay models from different ethnicities, body types, and backgrounds, the platform strives to promote a more inclusive standard of beauty. The website highlights that beauty comes in all forms and that everyone, regardless of their sexual orientation, deserves to be celebrated and represented in the fashion world.

Empowering LGBTQ+ Youth:

One of the most impactful aspects of the Gay Model is its potential to inspire and empower LGBTQ+ youth. Seeing role models who are unapologetically themselves can have a profound impact on young individuals who may be struggling with their own identity and self-acceptance. The platform’s message of self-love and acceptance sends a powerful signal that everyone deserves to pursue their dreams, regardless of their sexual orientation.

A Catalyst for Change:

The Gay Model website serves as a catalyst for change within the fashion industry. It encourages industry professionals to rethink their approach to casting and to recognize the immense talent within the LGBTQ+ community. By showcasing the incredible work of gay models, the platform calls for a more inclusive and representative industry that embraces diversity on all levels.

The Gay Model website is a powerful force for change in the fashion industry. It celebrates the diversity and talent of gay models, challenging stereotypes and promoting inclusivity. Through its inspiring content and stories, the platform empowers LGBTQ+ youth and encourages the industry to embrace a more inclusive standard of beauty. The Gay Model serves as a beacon of hope, reminding us that the fashion world has a responsibility to reflect the richness and diversity of the world we live in.