The Need To Dance – Jack Tors

The Jerky Boys, vol 4 album

Title: The Need To Dance

Characters: Jack Tors




0:01 Phone rings…

0:03 Nelson: “Programming.”

0:05 Voice 1: “Hello.”

0:06 Nelson: “Hello.”

0:07 Voice 1: “Yes. Nelson, please.”

0:08 Nelson: “Speaking. Hello?”

0:09 Voice 1: “Nelson??

0:10 Nelson: “Yeah.”

0:11 Voice 1: “Hi. How are you?”

0:13 Nelson: “Hi. Who’s this?”

0:14 Voice 1: “How you doin’, booster? Hello?”

0:16 Nelson: “Who am I speaking with please?

0:18 Voice 1: “This is Jack.”

0:20 Nelson: “I don’t recall.”

0:21 Voice 1: “Really? Hmm. You’re in charge of the programming, right?”

0:25 Nelson: “Not true.”
0:26 Voice 1: “What do you do?”

0:27 Nelson: “Digital programming coordinator.”

0:29 Voice 1: “Right. But don’t you put on videos?”

0:32 Nelson: “Not necessarily.”

0:35 Voice 1: “Hmm. That’s weird.”

0:36 Nelson: “What is this call pertaining to?”

0:36 Voice 1: “What about the dance mix? Well, it’s pertaining to me getting down there and dancing.”

0:42 Nelson: “Wait a second. OK.”

0:43 Voice 1: “Hurry up.”

0:46 Nelson: “Go ahead.”

0:47 Voice 1: “This little funky shit is goin’ on, you know.”

0:50 Nelson: “Whatever.”

0:51 Voice 1: “What is going on with you?” The attitude I sense it.”

0:54 Nelson: “I know. It’s an attitude on purpose. I’m really fuckin’ busy to be fuckin’ bullshittin’ on the phone right now. So how can I help you?”

1:00 Voice 1: “I want you to get me to do some dances in the videos.”

1:03 Nelson: “Go down in the club or fuckin’ shit like that. I don’t have time for that right now.”

1:06 Voice 1: “Nelson, is there any – oh.”

1:07 Hangs up.

1:09 Phone rings.

1:13 Nelson: “Programming.”

1:14 Voice 1: “Nelson?”

1:15 Nelson: “Speakin’.”

1:16 Voice 1: “Yeah. Eric told me to call you. That’s the only reason. But I seem to be breakin’ balls or something.”

1:22 Nelson: “I’m really busy. I mean what do you need?”

1:23 Voice 1: “Well, Eric said that you could squeeze me in a couple of these little dance mix things.”

1:28 Nelson: “What do you mean? What exactly is it that you are talkin’ about? I don’t know what the hell you are talkin’ about.”

1:32 Voice 1: “Well, for one, I’m a dancer. And I’m coming to you for help and you’re just shutting me. You’re kicking me like a dog.”

1:38 Nelson: “What the hell is it that I need to give to you? What do you need? What do you want?”

1:41 Voice 1: “Eric said you could squeeze me into videos.”

1:44 Nelson: “Who gives the shit what Eric says? I don’t understand why Eric is telling you anything.”

1:47 Voice 1: “Well, he said you could help me.”

1:49 Nelson: “That I could help you what?”

1:51 Voice 1: “I’m a dancer/choreographer. I do that for a living. I’m awesome.”

1:54 Nelson: “All right. Then call the…”

1:56 Voice 1: “I’m star struck.”

1:57 Nelson: “Call the dance studios or something. This is music videos. What the hell does that have to do with dance?”

2:02 Voice 1: “I know. But that’s my specialty. I’m a humdinger when it comes to this.”

2:08 Nelson: “Who gives a shit? Why are you telling me this? Do I care?”

2:11 Voice 1: “Why are you being like that?”

2:13 Nelson: “Because I’m really busy and you’re really taking up my time right now in useless nonsense conversation which has – which is goin’ nowhere – has no directive. I mean how the hell can I help you?”

2:21 Voice 1: “If Eric said that you could put me in a dance video…”

2:23 Nelson: “I said I don’t give a fuck what Eric says. How can I help you? What do you need? I don’t care what Eric said.”

2:26 Voice 1: “So Eric – so Eric has no pull?”

2:29 Nelson: “Who gives a shit? What do you need?”

2:31 Voice 1: “I need to dance, you fucker. Don’t you see it? I need to dance. And I want to tell you I want to dance all over you, you scumbag. I’m going to do a dance in your fuckin’ ass.”

2:35 Nelson laughing.

2:41 Nelson: “All right. You do that. All right. You do that. Thanks. Bye now.”

2:42 Voice 1: “Are you crazy? You fuck.”

2:46 Man laughs.