Fava Beans
The Jerky Boys, album 2
Title: Fava Beans
Characters:
Summary:
Transcript:
0:00 Phone rings..
0:03 Voice 1: “Can I help you?”
0:04 Voice 2: “Yeah, is it the restaurant?”
0:06 Voice 1: “Yes, it is.”
0:06 Voice 2: “Yeah, I was there a little while ago with my wife…”
0:09 Voice 1: “Uh-huh.”
0:09 Voice 2: “…and we ate some of them Fava beans.”
0:11 Voice 1: “Yes.”
0:12 Voice 2: “They got me fuckin’ awful sick there Charlie.”
0:15 Voice 1: “Who… what Fava beans?”
0:17 Voice 2: “You made me some Fava beans there with the, the little whacky… the bread that you got there. You got me sick as a dog.”
0:23 Voice 1: “Well, what are you… where are you… where were you sitting sir?”
0:26 Voice 2: “What?’
0:27 Voice 1: “Where were you sitting?”
0:28 Voice 2: “I was sitting out there by the front there. You know I got really sick from that shit. I ought to split your nuts from your head to the back of your [Inaudible 00:34].”
0:35 Voice 1: “No, no, no, no, no… nothing happened. Nobody order Fava bean. I didn’t serve Fava bean.”
0:38 Voice 2: “I got Fava beans. They got them all over coming out my ears backwards now. I’m sick like a fuckin’ animal over here.
0:43 Voice 1: “Fava bean and what?”
0:44 Voice 2: “You got my wife fuckin’, layin’ in a fuckin’ bowl of piss over here, fuckin’, pukin’ up shit.”
0:49 Voice 1: “Whoa! Whoa! Why you lying? What are you talking about, so what it…?”
0:51 Voice 2: “Look, you jerky little ass. I ought to split your nuts off the side of your face.”
0:56 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 00:56], what did you order? What did your order?”
0:57 Voice 2: “I told ya I ordered those Fava beans over there. You got them things fuckin’ stinkin’ up the house now.”
1:02 Voice 1: “Just Fava beans?”
1:03 Voice 2: “Yeah, the Fava beans with all that silly little juice on there, you fuckin’ whacky ass.”
1:07 Voice 1: “I didn’t. I didn’t… well, I didn’t serve any Fava beans there. I’m…”
1:10 Voice 2: “Alright. You’re angry with me now. Maybe I ought to come down there and fuckin’ make you eat…
1:13 Voice 1: “Excuse me.”
1:13 Voice 2: …eat your fucking’ shoe.”
1:14 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 01:14]… excuse me. I didn’t serve any Fava bean today. Just tell me where you were sitting.”
1:18 Voice 2: “I… I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’m gonna come down and I’m gonna stuff your shoes. Look, you [Inaudible 01:21] restaurant.
1:22 Voice 1: “Yes.”
1:23 Voice 2: “I’ll come down and make you eat your fuckin’ shoes.”
1:24 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 01:24].”
1:25 Voice 2: “I’m sick like a fuckin’ idiot over here.”
1:27 Voice 1: “No… nothing happened.”
1:28 Voice 2: “Aah!”
1:29 Voice 1: “The Fava bean is good. Everything is good. Nobody…”
1:30 Voice 2: “Oh, alright there. Let’s see how good it is. I’ll see you [Inaudible 01:33] Charlie.”