Sammy Cox

Discover the hilarious world of Sammy Cox at the Jerky Boys Store. Get your dose of side-splitting pranks and outrageous comedy with official merchandise.

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Herman – the woke version

Title: “Hermione”

[Setting: A cafe]

Caller: Hi, is this the artisanal coffee shop?

Barista: Yes, it is. How can I help you?

Caller: Uh, yeah, I have a bit of an issue. I ordered a soy latte, and it’s not soy.

Barista: I’m sorry to hear that. We strive to accommodate all dietary preferences. Let me fix that for you right away.

Caller: Thank you. And can you please make sure it’s not served in a plastic cup? I’m trying to reduce my plastic usage.

Barista: Absolutely. We use compostable cups made from plant-based materials.

Caller: Great, I appreciate that. Oh, and one more thing. Could you ensure that the coffee beans were ethically sourced and the farmers were paid fair wages?

Barista: Of course, our beans are sourced through fair trade practices, and we support sustainable farming initiatives.

Caller: That’s fantastic to hear. You know, I really appreciate your attention to detail and commitment to social and environmental responsibility.

Barista: Thank you for bringing these concerns to our attention. We’re always striving to do better for our community and the planet.

Caller: Absolutely. Keep up the good work. And I’ll be sure to spread the word about your ethical practices to my friends.

Barista: We appreciate your support. Enjoy your soy latte, and have a wonderful day.

Caller: Thanks, you too. Bye.

[End of call]

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Food & Drug Complaint – the woke version

Title: Conscious Consumers’ Concern

[The scene opens with a phone ringing in a bustling grocery store. A concerned voice picks up.]

Store Clerk: Good day, how may I assist you?

Caller: Hello, yes. I’m calling to voice some concerns about the products your store carries.

Store Clerk: Of course, I’m here to help. What seems to be the issue?

Caller: Well, I’ve noticed that some of the items you stock don’t align with our values of sustainability and ethical sourcing.

Store Clerk: I see. Could you provide me with more details?

Caller: Certainly. Firstly, your selection of fruits and vegetables seems to heavily favor those grown using conventional farming methods, which often involve harmful pesticides and contribute to environmental degradation.

Store Clerk: I understand your concern. We strive to offer organic and locally sourced produce whenever possible. I’ll be sure to relay your feedback to our purchasing team.

Caller: That’s a good start. Additionally, I’ve noticed that many packaged foods on your shelves contain ingredients that are detrimental to human health, such as excessive sugars, artificial additives, and preservatives.

Store Clerk: Your observation is valid. We’re committed to promoting healthier alternatives and are continuously reviewing our product offerings to better meet the needs of our conscious consumers.

Caller: I appreciate your willingness to address these issues. It’s crucial for businesses to prioritize the well-being of their customers and the planet over profit margins.

Store Clerk: Absolutely. We value your feedback and are dedicated to making positive changes within our store to support a more sustainable and socially responsible future.

Caller: Thank you for taking the time to listen and for your commitment to fostering positive change. I look forward to seeing improvements in your product selection.

Store Clerk: It’s our pleasure. We’re here to serve our community and ensure that everyone can shop with confidence knowing that their values are being respected. Thank you for bringing these concerns to our attention.

[The call ends with a sense of mutual understanding and a shared commitment to conscious consumerism.]

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Herman – Sammy Cox

The Jerky Boys, Album 4

Title: Herman

Characters: Sammy Cox, Herman

Summary:

In this skit from The Jerky Boys Show with Johnny Brannen, the comedic exchange revolves around prank calls featuring characters like Frank Rizzo, Sol Rosenberg, Herman, and Sammy Cox. The skit is sponsored by GameFly, with a brief mention at the beginning.

The prank calls begin with Frank Rizzo introducing himself, followed by Sol Rosenberg, both engaging in humorous and confusing conversations with unsuspecting recipients. The dialogue is characterized by mistaken identities, with Sol Rosenberg clarifying that his name is Sol, not Sal. The confusion continues as they interact with individuals who seem perplexed and, at times, irritated by the calls.

As the skit progresses, Herman receives a call from Sammy Cox, who comically complains about a hot cup of soup that has caused discomfort to his private parts. Herman, initially confused, tries to understand the situation but ends up laughing at Sammy Cox’s absurd complaints. The humor escalates as Sammy Cox accuses Herman of inappropriate actions with another character named Scott, incorporating suggestive and ridiculous scenarios into the conversation.

The skit concludes with Herman attempting to identify Sammy Cox, who playfully claims to be Pancho, adding a final touch of absurdity to the prank call. The exchange is filled with witty banter, mistaken identities, and over-the-top scenarios, providing a lighthearted and entertaining experience for the audience.

Transcript:

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