Egyptian Magician

The Jerky Boys, album 1

Title: Egyptian Magician

Characters: Tarbash

Summary:

In this skit, Tarbash, who identifies himself as the Egyptian Magician, calls in for an audition at a venue. Carol, the night manager, interacts with Tarbash, who enthusiastically describes his magic act. Tarbash’s act involves eating hot coal, stabbing a customer’s eye with a saber, having his cat maul performers on stage, and lighting people on fire, all while emphasizing that it’s fake and considered magic in his country.

Despite Carol’s surprise and attempts to process the extreme nature of Tarbash’s act, she tentatively allows him to audition for two tricks. Tarbash continues to elaborate, mentioning a disappearing chest trick and the inclusion of a small mountain cat to terrorize people. Carol, understandably concerned, advises against bringing the mountain cat for the first performance.

Tarbash casually suggests choking some faculty staff and introduces the idea of using a whip in his act, to which Carol responds with a resigned “whatever.” Despite the eccentricity of Tarbash’s act and Carol’s reservations, she invites him to stop by for the audition to see how the act goes, albeit cautiously. The exchange highlights the absurdity of Tarbash’s extreme magical concepts and Carol’s bewildered yet accommodating response.

Transcript:

0:00 Phone rings.

0:01 Voice 1: “Hiya.”

0:02 Tarbash : “Yes, hello.”

0:03 Voice 1: “Hello.”

0:04 Tarbash: “I called you before. My name is the Egyptian Magician.”

0:08 Voice 1: “The Egyptian Magician?”

0:10 Tarbash: “Right. I called. They told me to call back in one… ten minute.”

0:16 Voice 1: “Uh, hold on.”

0:19 Carol: “Hi, can I help you? Hi, this is Carol, the night manager.”

0:22 Tarbash: “Yes, my name is Tarbash, the Egyptian Magician. I do magic act.”

0:27 Carol: “Okay.”

0:28 Tarbash: “I…”

0:28 Carol: “If you want to come in and audition?”

0:30 Tarbash: “What I do, I eat hot coal.”

0:33 Carol: “That’s great.”

0:33 Tarbash: “I stab customer in eye with saber.”

0:37 Carol: “Uh-huh.”

0:37 Tarbash: “And I sit my cat on my performers and they maul them on stage.”

0:43 Carol: “Wow!”

0:44 Tarbash: “But in my country that considered [Inaudible 00:46].”

0:47 Carol: “Considered… yeah, that’s considered magic.”

0:49 Tarbash: “Right.”

0:50 Carol: “Great.”

0:51 Tarbash: “And then I light people on fire, but it is, you know, fake, you know and I…”

0:57 Carol: “It’s fake.”

0:58 Tarbash: “Right, but that’s what I do, the Egyptian Magician.”

1:02 Carol: “The Egyptian Magician.”

1.03 Tarbash: “Right. Then for encore, I punch my chest and then it disappear into the… the crowd.”

1:10 Carol: “You punch your chest and it disappears in the crowd. That’s it?”

1:17 Tarbash: “Yes, my friend.”

1:18 Carol: “Uh-huh. Umm… well, if you want to stop by, you would only be able to do two tricks.”

1:25 Tarbash: “Okay, that’s good enough for me.  I’m the best.”

1:28 Carol: “Okay.”

1:29 Tarbash: “Then…”

1:29 Carol: “Every Wednesday night.”

1:31 Tarbash: “Then I have small mountain cat that…”

1:34 Carol: “The mountain cat.”

1:35 Tarbash: “…that I terrorize people.”

1:37 Carol: “You terrorize people with a mountain cat. Okay. Well, I don’t know if you… you better not bring the mountain cat in for the first time.”

1:44 Tarbash: “Okay.”

1:45 Carol: “Okay. Umm… come by quarter to nine, sign up and see how you do.”

1:51 Tarbash: “Okay and then maybe just for extra bonus, I choke some of you faculty staff.”

1:58 Carol: “Yeah, you choke the staff. Yeah, okay. Whatever!”

2:02 Tarbash: “Okay, then I come out with whip.”

2:05 Carol: “Yeah, you come out with the whip, okay.  Well, stop by. We’ll see how the act goes.”

2:09 Tarbash: “Okay, my friend.”

2:10 Carol: “Thank you my friend.”

Learn more about Tarbash the Magnician.

Egyptian Magician Online

In the skit titled “Egyptian Magician” from The Jerky Boys’ first album, the conversation unfolds between Tarbash, who claims to be an Egyptian Magician, and Carol, the night manager. Tarbash attempts to secure an audition for his magic act, detailing his tricks, including eating hot coal, stabbing a customer’s eye with a saber, and having his cat maul performers on stage. He explains that such acts are considered magic in his country.

Despite Carol’s disbelief, Tarbash continues, mentioning fake fire tricks and his signature act of making his chest disappear into the crowd. Carol cautiously agrees to let him audition, limiting him to two tricks and advising against bringing in a mountain cat initially. Tarbash casually adds that he might choke some faculty staff and introduces the idea of using a whip in his act.

Carol hesitantly accepts his intentions and suggests he stop by to perform on Wednesday night, albeit with clear apprehension about the potential chaos his act might cause.

The skit humorously portrays Tarbash’s outrageous and potentially dangerous magic act while Carol cautiously navigates the conversation, attempting to accommodate his eccentric requests for an audition at the venue.