Scaffolding

The Jerky Boys, album 2

Title: Scaffolding

Characters: Frank Rizzo

Summary:

In this skit, the phone rings, and Frank answers the call seeking help for a complicated situation. He reveals that he’s in charge of a scaffold with people stuck on it, which he had initially rigged for his boss. However, the number of people on the scaffold exceeded the recommended limit, causing panic. Frank confesses to putting nine people on a 22-foot scaffold designed for two.

As Frank describes the chaotic scene, he explains that the scaffold has become detached from the wall, leading to some individuals falling into bushes. To complicate matters further, there are women on the scaffold screaming, and an elderly lady on a higher floor is firing shots. Frank urgently asks for assistance in getting the elderly lady off the wall.

The person on the other end of the line questions why the elderly lady is on the scaffold in the first place, to which Frank replies that he needs to rescue the people stuck on the scaffold before his boss returns to the site. The conversation reveals that the scaffold is five floors high, and the suggestion is made to involve the fire department with a bucket for rescue.

Transcript:

0:01 Phone rings..

0:03 Voice 1: “Hello.”

0:04 Frank: “Hi.  How’re you doin’ there chief?  Look, I need a little help.  You guys repair motors?”

0:08 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 00:08].  Who’s this?”

0:10 Frank: “This is Frank.  I got a little problem.  You see what happened here.  I got some people on a scaffold.  They just… it’s, you know, my boss’ scaffold.  I got, you know, all these people watched me rig the job.  Then they were all standing around.  They want rides.  I put about nine people on a 22-footer.  I took them up there and then they started to fuckin’ panic.  I got one of the motors stuck.  I’m up around the fifth floor.

0:30 Voice 1: “But you’re only supposed to have two people.”

0:31 Frank: “I know, I know, I know, but all these people were asking me nice if they could go up.  I had a couple of broads up there.  They panicked.  The scaffold come away from the wall.  A couple of them went down in the bushes. I got some serious fuckin’ problems here.  Then I’ve got the women on the scaffold screamin’ and some old lady up the fuckin’ floor above starts firin’.  I clam-shot her down on the fuckin’ people on a rig.  You can… you can get her off the wall?”

0:52 Voice 1: “Well, what in hell for is she up?”

0:54 Frank: “So [Inaudible 00:54], I got, you know, eight, nine people on there fuckin’ and I gotta get them down before my boss comes back to the site tonight.”

0:59: Voice 1: “How high is the way up?”

1:00 Frank: “It’s up five floors.”

1:01 Voice 1: “You better get the fire department with a bucket out there.”

1:04 Frank: “Oh, for Christ’s sake. I’ll call you back.”

1:05 Voice 1: “Okay.”